Shelter

"Hey beautiful come here, I have something for you" he said "Does it look like I wanna talk to you ?" she said "Come here, come here.. " he said "Seriously..." she said Moving forward to the woods he now comes closer. Facing him and shouting "Get the fuck away from me" she said "Oh... I m sorry" he said Whistling at his friend and pointing his finger where she stands something like "let’s show this girl what we’re about... Fast walking through trees, "I need your protection" she said "You need to watch out, it s the beginning of the pot season" he said "I didn’t know there was such a thing as a season for pot" she thought "I shouldn’t have replied" she said "These guys are full of testosterones" he said "And I’m full of oestrogens" she said "Too bad your dog’s not a doberman" he said "What was I thinking..." she said "I’m gonna walk with you some more" she said "My pleasure" he said "Next thing you’ll know I’m gonna invite myself to your place for tea time" she said "I’d be delighted if I wasn’t walking to work" he said "What for" she said "I’m a teacher…. Sociology" he said "ah…" she said "It’s actually to help students express themselves in a better manner" he said "that’s cool" she thought "I think this is it" she said "Well, my name is… (forgotten)" he said "Mine’s christiane" she replied.

33 and reborn

A Magic dwells in each Beginning... Hermann Hesse "For since by man came death, by man came also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive" As for my love ones...And the righteous one shall arise from sleep, [Shall arise] and walk in the paths of righteousness, And all his path and conversation shall be in eternal goodness and grace. - 1 Enoch 92:3 Exodus 15:13 "In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling. Psalms 6:4 Turn, O LORD, and deliver me; save me because of your unfailing love. Psalms 13:5 But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. Psalms 32:10 Many are the woes of the wicked, but the LORD’s unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him. Psalms 33:5 The LORD loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love. Psalms 33:22 May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you. Psalms 36:7 How priceless is your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings. Psalms 44:26 Rise up and help us; redeem us because of your unfailing love. Psalms 48:9 Within your temple, O God, we meditate on your unfailing love. Psalms 51:1 Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Psalms 52:8 But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever. Psalms 90:14 Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Psalms 107:8 Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, Psalms 107:15 Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, Psalms 107:21 Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men. Psalms 130:7 O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. Psalms 143:8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Psalms 143:12 In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant. Proverbs 19:22 What a man desires is unfailing love; better to be poor than a liar. Isaiah 54:10 Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you. Lamentations 3:32 Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. Hosea 10:12 Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until he comes and showers righteousness on you. New beginning... virginal.

These boots are made for walkin'

and that's what they do... and 've been doing since November. For the first time since fall, I've been wearing "non-winter" boots! Trust me, it's fantastic news when you're a boot lover. So far, I've been doomed to wear the same pair of boots, the only pair that's been allowing me not to walk like a penguins on the ice (aren't they cute though)... the only pair that's been keeping me warm... the only pair destroyed from day one by the merciless salt... Before I knew it though, snow's back on sending me the clear message that sticking to that same pair of "adorable but tired black Nov til May boots" is a must. I've always found the Montreal weather obsession idiotic. Being stocked in elevators with 9 to 5 "akward ('xcuse the pleonasm) office people" on their way to their grim desk I'd hear : "it's snowing 'gain today hey..." How long can you use the same line when snow's part of your everyday life for 5 months straight... seriously. Once the snow subject's over they usually bring up how long they've got left before retirement... gee... silence's golden but I sometimes wanna scream... The TV's on as I am writing these lines and, surprise surprise Mrs Weatherwoman's on talking about the current snowstorm, the one I can see from my window. Thank you Woman for telling me something I can see smell touch hear and feel. Dude, she's so enthousiastic about this snowstorm. How does she manage to act as if she hasn't already talked about that shit weather every day for the past 5 months already. Her blond hairdo's bouncing as she joyfully explains a snowstorm can only be called so if it's at least 15 cetimeters of snow... well this piece of info's definitively helping. Thanks to you lady I now understand the nuance in between snow crystals, snowflakes, rime, graupel, hail and what defines a snowstorm versus non storm snow. Oh now the ancorlady wraps up the news with the ultimate question "will it ever stop snowing?" Guys I'm not making this up... This is the everyday news in Canada. That's as good and serious as it gets... Snow's the main character whenever you turn your TV on. The birds sings everyday, the sun's on every morning, the moon stares at us at night... do we talk about it every day in the news... Maybe we should. But my point's I wake up with snow falling, I walk outside and help my friend shuffle the snow off her car so we can go to school, same story on my way home. I censore myself from watching the local news cause half of it about telling you what you already know: it is snowing. Months of white flakes falling over you and wearing the same boots every single from November til March does not need explanation.

all the world's a stage

and all the men and women merely players: They have their entrances and their exits. Soaked in the steamy hot tub, I am breaking the "longest bath ever taken record" and while at it, doing some thinking... Recently, figments from the past re-surfaced and caught me by surprise. I realised that I'm still drowning in a sea of anger, resentment and regrets... It isn't news cause I have a good sense of who I am and where I stand... I'm not a fool and don't deny nor repress my emotions. Yet feeling so vulnerable and emotional years after a trauma hit me hard. I believe that the idea of waisted time is illusionary. Therefore we evolve even when we think we don't. So warm and content from so much bath heat, I tell myself that whatever path I'm into, it is the right one. That's when I realised I might never recover from some life changing event. Deceptive company, poor decision making can mess you up for ever... Pouring once again more hot water I was trying to figure out how to move on/grow the healthier possible way despite all these feelings on which I have such poor control on. I want to be proactive and refuse to be a victim. The survivor I am's gonna keep on shining... It's a must. I then got this insight: maybe it's not about recovering as much as making it about me. There's many actors in my unfortunate chapter... Sorry characters who no longer have room in My play. Yet, I've been giving "these now virtual players" power to develop the story further and take control of my future. Well, "no more" I say! These vilains only exist because I let them exist. They are part of me only if I allow them to. They are given the importance I give them. It is therefore time to fire every gloomy participating actor of the sad act of my life. From my womb tub I make it official : I fire all of the actors but the protagonist! I cannot turn back the already read red pages, can only write the present therefore future. From now on, the only person responsible of my tale is me, the person to blame when the story turns sour is me again and I am the one to put myself out of my history misery, thank you. (end of the act).